Sunday, August 21, 2011

Maybe I am crazy. I mean, I saw something that shouldn't exist, and then my best friend just disappears, and no one remembers him. It feels like I made him up, or something... And ever since that night, I haven't seen that thing, not even a glance.

I don't even know how it would feel if I was crazy. Or if I am.

I'm rambling, aren't I? And talking to myself... on a blog... It seems like I've been talking to myself for a while. No one feels like talking to me about this, no one is helping me. I'm all alone. If I had some confirmation that this was really happening, or if someone was going through the same thing, maybe then I wouldn't question my sanity. Maybe.

...

Fuck it. Fuck you people who help each other except us 'newbies' - even if it's just one comment or something. Yeah, I understand you're probably going through a hard time. Whatever.

Nevermind. I'm just talking to myself again, because no one's there.

Oi, for anyone reading this and having the same sort of problem, take my advice. Don't wait for help; help yourself. That's what I'm doing.

I've read enough of these blogs to know what happens next. Some masked freak decides to be an asshole, come into my life, and fuck it all up - I think that hobo fits the bill pretty nicely, eh? Or, Suit comes along and decides that he's going to be my shadow. Well, I'm not going to wait for something to happen. I'm getting out of town before something happens to me, or one of my friends. And if I am crazy, well, it's not like it can get any worse, can it?

The only thing I'm worried about is, ironically, how all of my years at school were for nothing. Dumb, right? Lots of people hate school. Hah...

No, that's not the only thing; the other thing is Sarah. She probably hates me because I haven't talked to her since her dad was killed. But I need some... closure, or something. I need to tell her that everything is going to be alright. Even when it's not.

Huh... I have an idea. It's kind of crazy, but hey, if I am insane, it's right up my alley. I need to try something before I get out of here. And no, I'm not putting it up so that hobo can stop me. I'll save it for my next post.

Until next time.

- Art

6 comments:

  1. Whatareyoudoingdontleaveyet

    Running honestly won't do anything that you cant get from staying put it seems counterintuitive yes but you should try to finish school if you can. Education is not worthless. I learned this the hard way and

    my life would be different had I not given up on learning.

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  2. or else they run and things get worse and worse slowly until they finally lose it and kill themselves or get murdered in a back alley of a motel

    the only one who its worked for is M and no one is like him

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  3. How can I help? You're the other side of the Atlantic from me and I have responsibilities here.

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  4. @Maurice: So, I should just wait until that happens here - but instead of the back alley of a motel, it's in my house. Yeah, that sounds like a great idea.

    @PlanetNiles: I don't know, maybe some advice?

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  5. When we were younger, we used to pretend we were great heroes like Hercules and Achilles, slaying monsters and saving the girl. We had no definitive view of evil, and so it was only when we were faced by a real monster that we knew why we hid under the covers at night. We knew why others thought their was a monster in the closet or under their bed - because there was. It wanted us, but you got away somehow. And now he found you, and there's no place to run. Unless you submit, your insides will be... rearranged.

    Sweet dreams, Arthur.

    ~ amiwhereallcry

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