Wednesday, October 12, 2011

News Time, Children!

First off, sorry about the ‘I’ll update soon!’ and then it takes me three or four days to get it up. I’ve been losing track of time and such because my sleeping schedule is so fucked up at the moment. Well, that and something else, but more on that later.

Anyway. So, what’s new in my life, you might be wondering?

Well, since I’ve been watching some late night television, I’ve come up with a top ten list of what’s most important. So, without further ado, I unveil Arthur Pierce’s Top Ten Important Facts About the Past Few Months.

10.) Chex Mix kicks ass. No, seriously. It has everything I like about food: salt, crunchy stuff, and (sometimes) chocolate. The only thing that’s better than Chex Mix is pizza, but I can’t have that all the time. Plus, you can’t carry pizza in little bags while stumbling around the forest for hours on end. Well, you could, but then it gets really disgusting.

9.) Movies are getting better. Well, some of them, anyways. I could do without the damn remakes, though; they’re in every genre now. Next thing you know, they’ll be remaking The Godfather or something.

Which reminds me, they’re remaking John Carpenter’s The Thing. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU, HOLLYWOOD. WHAT THE FUCK.

8.) Steve Jobs is dead. Or is he? I personally believe that his consciousness is being placed into a computer as we speak. (If this actually happens, you heard it from me first)

Right, onto the more serious stuff…

7.) Humans’ ignorance levels have increased over time. I’ll go more into detail on this later, but for now, keep that in mind.

6.) History tends to repeat itself! Especially in my world…

5.) Remember when your mommy and daddy told you not to talk to strangers? Remember when they said don’t take candy from them, too? Well, they should have said to not even fucking stare at the stranger, or else he’d stalk and brutally kill you.

4.) What would the world do without music? I know I’d be driven mad by the whispers at night. Remember when I told you all about them? The fucking voices in my room in the middle of the night? Well, I managed to stop listening to it. Just put on some music, turn it up enough to where I can barely hear anything, and BAM, I’m in business. Of course, my ears are hurting, so that sucks.

3.) I am a horrible friend. So, it turns out that I probably could have avoided ALL of this if I hadn’t of made this blog in the first place! All of the people in my hometown would still be there, safe and sound. Not so nowadays! It’s just a fucking ghost town here, and it’s all my fault!

Okay, so I’m exaggerating. It may not be the whole town, but a good portion is gone. Or dead. Probably both, too. People started believing, and when they believe… woosh… they’re gone. I sometimes wonder if it’s because they just have really weak wills, or if they are scared shitless because they’re faced with some eldritch abomination. Maybe the people who create the other blogs/vlogs have stronger wills because they’re more open to the idea that something exists out there, so when they finally see that thing a small part of their mind goes “Oh, I knew it!”

I don’t know. Maybe. Hell if I know.

It doesn’t really matter in the end, though, does it? Friends and family gone? Check. Forced to keep moving because of an eerie feeling that if you don’t something is going to get you? Check. Stalked by not one, but two paranormal things? Check!

Which leads directly to my next point.

2.) So, ever since that night, I haven’t seen a trace of the ‘Slender Man’. Oh, sure, I’ve seen what he can do – my town is evidence of that – but never actually seen him. I wonder if this is because he’s a picky eater, or if I’m being used as the snare that’s bringing in all of the other things he’s taken. Wow, I wonder if that is actually true; could he be that intelligent to use someone like me to spread the word? Oh, that just pisses me off even more. I played right into his damn hands.

Thankfully, the government of the U.S. of A. must have anticipated this. Nothing about the mass disappearances has appeared on the news, so it seems like they’re keeping this all a bit hush-hush. Or, that’s what I’m gathering from this, anyway.

Oh, right. The second piece of shit that’s been stalking me has been something else! If I haven’t already clued you in on the other strange happenings that have been going on around me, here’s a hint: Those fitness guys on YouTube aren’t the only people being attacked by it.

1.) Love is real. Not the “Oooh, I’m in (teenage) love! We’re going to grow up and get married and then have babies and yeah!” kind of shit you see in high school. It’s something I can’t really describe. It just felt, for an instant there… Kind of like… Ugh, I can’t even begin to describe it.

Sarah, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.

- Art


  1. Sounds like good times to me, bro. We gonna meet up dawg, have a party? You bring the beer, I'll bring the bitches, right?

    Stay frosty.

  2. Oh, yeah, we'll have a party, all right. Bring your sharp-dressed friend, too, so I can thank him for all he's done for me.